1. Christmas cards.
I love checking my mailbox in December. Truth be known, I'm not normally fond of weeding through mail. It tends to pile up on the kitchen counter until I just can't take it anymore, and I spend a couple hours going through it. Usually while watching TV.
But December is different. There is so much mail from family and loved ones. Carefully posed Christmas photos, creatively worded Christmas letters, and thoughtfully chosen Christmas cards. This one, from my cousin, makes me extra happy because ... coffee and cookies. You can never go wrong with that combo.
2. Acknowledgement.
Not everybody is going to think of us as a family of 6. And that's OK. Legally we are a family of 3. At dinnertime there are three plates and three cups on the table. Our minivan only has 3 seats that are typically occupied. And laundry--(let me just say that I pray for all of you with a billion kids living in your home)--is a lot easier as a family unit of 3 rather than a family of 6.
But in our hearts, we are a family of 6. And when that is acknowledged, I smile. It makes the past 7 years feel like it was worth it.
3. And on a lighter note, incorrect test answers. Yes, incorrect test answers make me happy.
My 8-year-old had a test on inventors at school yesterday. He couldn't think of the answer to one of the questions, so he decided to be, well, inventive, and hoped he would get lucky.
Now you may be wondering, as I was, who is Bill Graymon? Jack says he made him up. But why "Bill Graymon"? No reason. Just a name he made up.
I feel like he should have gotten at least 1/2 a point for his creativity!
He likes pancakes, strawberry smoothies, and french fries.
He loves going to school; I suspect it's mostly for the social aspect.
He never wants to lose, and he never wants you to lose. So usually he declares a tie.
He rarely will say what his favorite is in any given category--whether it's a friend, babysitter, food, or animal--he always says he likes all of them.
Except the color red. Red has been his favorite for more than two years. And his favorite cake is strawberry cake--even if he's never had it--because strawberries are red.
He's the tallest five year old in his class at preschool, Sunday School, and Cubbies.
He loves going to Cubbies and to church. For a while he would cry and throw a fit every time we tried to leave.
When I asked him earlier today if he knew his Cubbies verse, Lamentations 3:23, (Great is your faithfulness) he looked at me like I was crazy and said, "Of course, Mom. It's a song!" Then he proceeded to sing the old hymn, "Great is Thy Faithfulness" in his best opera voice. He only knows one line, but it's pretty key to the song.
I take credit for any singing ability he has. Especially in the operatic genre.
He's not very patient. Halfway through most events--a movie, the circus, a drive in the car--he'll say, "I thought we'd be home by now. Didn't you?"
He hears every single conversation I don't want him to hear, and proceeds to ask a million questions about it.
He never hears me give instructions, and will readily admit he wasn't listening when I ask him why he hasn't put his shoes on or gathered his coat and mittens or brushed his teeth.
He is the best at going to bed. He's usually asleep in five minutes or less. But he'll always ask if he can stay up a few more minutes and "cuddle," because he knows I'm a pushover for a good cuddle.
His best friends are Alex, Sammy, Claire, and Anne Marie. He's not sure if he will marry Claire or Anne Marie, but right now Anne Marie has an edge over Claire because Claire growls at him, and "it's scary."
If he could, he'd eat at McDonald's and Dunkin Donuts for every meal, every day.
He hates any food that is green, even though we make him eat something green almost every day.
Back when he was "regular four" he only liked peanut butter sandwiches, but when he turned four and a half, he started liking peanut butter AND jelly sandwiches.
He has favorite stuffed animals and he pretends they are real. Christmas Puppy, Baby Pooh, Jake, Froggie, and Little Bear. And when he sleeps with them at night, they must be lined up in that exact order. The order has something to do with size--smallest ones on the outside of the lineup, and biggest in the middle. And the smaller ones that are closest to his heart (physically speaking) are the ones that are closest to his heart (emotionally speaking).
He is good at spelling, computer games, typing, and he can read a little. His handwriting is atrocious. He can hardly write his own name legibly, probably because he's destined to be a doctor.
However, he says he wants to be a daddy when he grows up, probably because he has such an amazing one.
He loves to read from his Jesus Storybook Bible every night before bed, and when we write down the things we pray for, he always asks to pray about the exact same things. Every night... "That the Judge says yes. That M, M, and D come home soon. That DeeDee doesn't get no more headaches. That Mrs. Berger's leg gets better. (A lady we haven't seen in months, but she left a deep impression on him.) And that Baby Brendan and Little Allie get better soon."
He loves to be tickled. In fact, he begs to be tickled. He can't fathom why I don't enjoy it.
He has a love-hate relationship with our dog, Lucy. He is very proud of her, and he brags about her to his friends. But it bothers him that Lucy always wants to sit close to me, "in his spot." It also bothers him that Lucy can't do any tricks. I try to explain that some dogs are cute and some are smart, but he keep suggesting that she go to school.
He loves bow ties. And wearing fancy clothes. But most days you'll find him in jeans, a t-shirt, and barefoot.
He hates wearing socks. I think it's because he was born in Florida.
The first thing he does when he gets home from being out anywhere is sit on the couch, take off his socks, and clean between his toes. Every.time. It's like his little ritual.
He says he hates baths, but he always wants to stay in the tub for a long time--usually 45 minutes or longer.
I love the way he smells when he's fresh out of the tub, with baby shampoo scent on his silky blonde hair.
When he's sick he thinks it's great fun to sleep on the couch with Mommy, in the middle of the night, despite the fact that our couch isn't that long. Or wide. And the dog usually wants to join us. Oh, and he likes to lie right on top of me.
In those moments, I remind myself that someday soon my little boy will be a big boy and won't want to snuggle up with his mom when he's coughing or congested or has a tummy ache. And so I breathe deeply, run my fingers across his cheek, and try to soak in every moment of his 4 year old love.
He's a boy through and through. He loves trucks, cars, monster machines, robots, light sabers, farting, and making weird boy noises.
His favorite TV show is Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, even though I think he knows he's getting a little old for it.
He gets hot easily, and his cheeks flush read like his mom's, and his lily white skin easily burns in the sun. When he sweats he says he has "hot wet" on his skin.
The first thing I noticed about him when he was born was that his fingers look just like his dad's. And they still do.
His face will always tell you exactly what he's feeling.
He can't eat anything without getting it on his face. And he doesn't care.
He gets upset at injustice, but he'll readily forgive anyone who apologizes sincerely.
He has a long attention span and can play for nearly an hour by himself, making up storylines with toys that were never created to go together.
He hates coloring but he loves playing with yarn. Give him a ball of yarn and he'll be happy for the afternoon. And the house will resemble Charlotte's Web on crack.
There's so much more, but it would take forever to write everything I love about this boy. This boy who will turn five in just one more day.
So many of you have joined us on this journey, and we are thankful.
We wanted to give you a brief update on a very complicated situation. We
have not given up on the children. Things seem somewhat bleak, but we
are still working with our team in Ethiopia to get the three siblings home.
There are letters being written, appeals being made (not
to the judge as he won't hear any but other avenues), and meetings being
held with key players. The next week is fairly critical
as we wait for answers from some government officials.
If that doesn't
turn out favorable, we will wait until October when some new officials
will be installed in the Court and hope they will agree to hear our
appeal.
We learned today
that the children's orphanage expects to close; they have found local
Ethiopian families for the other children but not for ours or for one
other little girl. (A sweet family in Utah has been trying to adopt her
for more than 2 years.)
We also believe there are only 1 or 2 families
still trying to adopt children from this Region of Ethipia; the others have all
given up. We, however, won't give up until the door is slammed shut,
locked, bolted, and barricaded. And even then we may keep pushing. We're
not superheroes by any means...we're just a mom and a dad and a brother
fighting to give three beautiful children what every child deserves...a
family.
If you saw my status update today on Facebook, you know that I took a
bit of a tumble. I singlehandedly tried to move a desk from our
basement to our main level.
The desk is not a heavy one,
but it is somewhat large. I made it up several stairs, with my
3-year-old boy cheering me on from behind. Just as I neared the landing
where the stairs turn, I lost my balance, my legs buckled, and
everything started moving in slow motion.
I was falling.
The desk was falling. We were both crashing toward my son. I had the
presence of mind to tell Jack to move out of the way, and luckily he
wasn't hurt. The desk and I did not fare as well.
I saw this pin on Pinterest RIGHT AFTER I fell. #Hilarious
Moral of the story is that some things in life cannot be done by yourself. You need help in order to be successful.
Adoption
is the same way. So many of you have come alongside us and helped us
and prayed for us. And we are so grateful. So I wanted to let you know
where things stand, and how you can continue to pray for us.
Right now there are some crucial things going on here in the USA and in Ethiopia.
First,
what's happening in the USA: Our children's papers are being reviewed
by the United States Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS).
Before we can move forward with the adoption, we need their blessing.
This process can take 8-12 weeks, and we've been in it for about 4
weeks. According to our agency, the USCIS has been requesting additional
paperwork on most cases, and that slows things down considerably. Our
agency did everything they could to cross all their t's and dot all
their i's, but whether USCIS thinks it's enough to prove the legitimacy
of the children's orphan status is debatable. A lot of it depends on the
person reviewing the case.
If you are a praying
person, we would really appreciate your prayers for a favorable review
and no request for additional evidence.
This is also an
intense time in Ethiopia. We've been informed that we've been assigned a
Guardian Court Date for October 31. We are not required to be at this
court appearance; it is for the children's current guardian (the
orphanage manager) to state again that they truly are orphans and that
they are OK with an international adoption.
But here's
the interesting part. Any child being adopted who is 11
or older must also appear in court and state that they want to be adopted.
Our son is 11, so he will also appear.
He
and his younger sisters are residing in northern Ethiopia, and federal
court is in the capital city. It is not a
terribly far distance, but road conditions would make going by car very
difficult. So he and his guardian will get up early in the morning, fly
to Addis Ababa, where they will be joined by our agency's social worker.
They will go to court, and "D" will say whether he wants to be adopted.
I
hope he says yes. I think he will, but it is his choice. His sisters
have no say in the matter because of their age, and he is very close to
them, so even if he has doubts, I think he will want to do it so he can
stay with them.
That is pretty big.
But
something else pretty big is going to happen on that day as well. Our
agency's social worker is going to tell him about us. While he and his
sisters know they will be adopted, we don't think they've been told
anything about us. At this meeting he will be presented with three photo
books we made--one for him, one for his sister L, and one for his sister
M. The books contain pictures of our family, our home, and places they
will frequent when they live here such as their school, church, downtown
area, etc. We also included cards for each child with a personal
message.
The social worker will talk through
everything with him and explain the books. I don't know if this will
occur before he makes his court appearance or after....I'm guessing
maybe before so he can be more informed?
I have to be
honest. I have that same nervous feeling you get when you're on a first
date. I really hope he likes us. It seems silly when I type the words
into the computer, but it's how I feel. I want him to like us and want
to be a part of our family.
Later that evening, D will fly
back to Northern Ethio to his orphanage. He will be given a big
responsibility: to share the books with his sisters and explain
everything to them.
Will you pray for D on Oct. 31? (No,
they don't celebrate Halloween in Ethio, in case you're wondering.) It
will be so much information for him to take in. I know as the older
brother he feels a certain sense of responsibility for his sisters, and
he wants the very best for them. Please pray that everything goes
smoothly--from the flight to the meeting
with the social worker and, of course, the court appearance. Pray that
God will prepare D and his sisters to be a part of a family after a
very long time without one. Pray that their young hearts will be flooded
with peace and joy.
Someone recently said to me, "I'm
sure they will be so happy and so grateful to find out about you!" I
hope she is right, but in actuality, change is hard. Change is scary.
And some people are resistant to change. It's hard to leave
every.single.thing you know and hold dear and venture out to a new
beginning. Or at least I imagine it's hard. Actually, I can't imagine it
at all. I would be terrified.
But God...
He
started this process, and we are confident He will complete it for His
glory, for our joy, and for the well being of these three children whom
He loves so dearly.
Hopefully we will get some news late in the day on the 31st and be able to share it with you. Until then, please keep praying.
