30 September 2015

Conclusion

Conclusion of the Adoption Journey.


Haha. Just kidding.

You know how when someone says they have reached a decision in a matter, you kinda think they have reached a decision? Like yes or no. Yes, the kids can go with you. No, sorry, the kids are staying here.

Well, we've been told a few times now that a decision would be reached. As you'll recall there were vacations, rainy season closures, appeals from the other side, new arguments, unexpected national holidays, too busy, not enough time to review, etc. etc.

But today was THE DAY. The day when all questions would be answered. Would M, M, and D be permitted to have a loving family, a mother and father to care for them? The waiting was over.

...

Or so we thought.

...

Maybe it's a cultural thing? Maybe something gets lost in translation? I don't know because even our agency, which has worked in Ethio for a long time, says this is the most complicated, never-ending, frustrating case. It seems so clear to all of us. Four kids need a family (our 3 and 1 other.) Their orphanage is closing. Their is a drought in their region. They've been in orphanage care practically their whole lives. No one, NOT ONE PERSON in their country has volunteered to step up and give them a loving home. And here we are. Approved by the state of Illinois. Approved by the U.S. Federal Gov and Immigration. Referrals from pastors, community leaders, friends, employers, doctors, psychologists, social workers. And we've paid money. A lot of money. Much of it donated by you, our friends and family. More money than many American families earn in an entire year.

And the Judge's decision today was to wait and see.

He wants to see legitimate, documented proof from the children's region and from their orphanage manager that efforts to find an adoptive family in country have been made ... and nothing is available.

What will this look like? Will they post an ad in the paper? Will they hang posters in the town center? Will they make phone calls and interview extended family members for the second or third time to confirm they are unable or unwilling to care for these children? And how long must these efforts go on? A month? Three months? Six months? A year?

We don't know the answers to any of these questions. We will try to get more information in the coming days, but for now, we know this:
  • M, M, and D (and their little friend S) will not be coming home to us in the near future.
  • The case is not closed, and there is the possibility that they will come home to us at some point in the future.
  • The Judge said orphanage care is no longer an options, so a family in Ethio must be found for them, or he will give them to us.
  • We love these children with all our hearts, and we are saddened by this news.
  • We won't give up on them, no matter how long it takes. They deserve a family. 
  • God is still good. We get frustrated with Him sometimes. (or a lot.) But He's our only hope. As we look back on our lives, we see how He has orchestrated so many things for our good and His glory. He has said no to some things we desperately wanted, and it was maddening, annoying, heartbreaking. At the time. But later it all made sense. And sometimes He has made us wait for something. We get upset with His timeline...until later when we see how many things were being worked out behind the scenes. So we cling to the hope that this is the case once again. 

So many of you have reached out to us with phone calls, texts, emails, posts to FB, and private messages. Please know that we read and appreciate every one. We truly want to respond to everyone, but we are taking some time to process this latest twist. And we still have jobs to do...Ken with his fulltime work, me with my partime freelance and fulltime mommy-ing.

In all of this, we don't want our work to suffer or our son to suffer. We also have things going on with Ken's mom, who was recently re-diagnosed with cancer. We had hoped that her chemo and radiation the past six months had taken care of it, but unfortunately it has come back. Would you please pray for her -- that God will comfort her, that her pain will be alleviated, and that the doctors will make wise decisions concerning her care?

And please pray for M, M, and D. I asked the social worker today to please report back on what they are telling the children. I want them to know that we love them so much. We haven't forgotten or rejected them. And the only reason this is taking so long is because they are such wonderful human beings that everyone wants them. <3

Thanks, friends. We love and appreciate you.

3 comments:

  1. Oh Luann we will keep praying and trusting God is working out a perfect plan :-) love you and we will pray for Ken"s mom...

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  2. I only have one word for this: GAH! All I can say is that all of you are going to shine like beautiful silver by the time all this is over. Hang in there, love. "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life." Proverbs 13:25

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  3. Luann, this is heartbreaking, but not as heartbreaking as a no. I've been praying that all this is so that the judge will see well and surely that you are the right parents for the precious 3: M, M, and D!

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