A New Day

We mark time in different ways. An anniversary, a birthday, a holiday, the start of a new year. Today I'm remembering one year ago today.

It was on that day when I took three pregnancy tests. Two in quick succession, another one a few hours later. All had a double line. Pregnant. My hands shook and I wondered if it could be true. I cried tears of happiness, alone in my bathroom, and I waited anxiously for my husband of just four months to get home from work to share the news.

It had been a busy week. Just the day prior we had flown home from Chicago. A funeral. My mother's funeral. We saw her laid to rest, in the plot next to my father. He was buried there just four years earlier.

But despite being tired from travel and grief, I couldn't rest. I was having a baby! I went to Home Depot and bought a decorating magazine for kids' rooms. I clipped my favorite pictures and hung them on the wall in what was then the "Man Cave."

When Ken walked in the door from work, I told him I was starting a new project. He looked at me inquisitively. I said it was in the Man Cave and asked him to close his eyes as I led him in there. I guided him to the wall where the nursery pictures hung. He stood there for a moment, staring, digesting. Silent. And then he said, "Is this what I think it is?" I said yes, and we hugged and hugged and hugged.

That week marked the end of one journey and the start of a new one. Today, as I bounced Jack on the exercise ball (yes, that's how he likes to fall asleep), I stared out the sliders at the lake. I watched ducks skim the surface of the water, leaving white foamy water in their wake. Then they'd take off, circle round, and another would follow. I thought about how much my mama loved watching the birds on that very lake. She'd sit on her balcony, just across the lake from our place, and drink her coffee, knit, and watch those crazy birds.

I imagine there's a viewing room in heaven, reserved for parents. There's a glass window where they can gaze down and see what their children are doing and what's going on in the world. My mom's window is positioned just above Lake Emerald. There she can watch the ducks splash and swim, and she can see her youngest daughter bouncing her only grandson to sleep.

We're all OK, mama. We're all OK.

What I've Been Up To ...

Seven years ago I moved to Florida. It's been a wild ride:

I got a dog, got married, and got pregnant. I was the top editor at a newspaper and the lowest secretary at a school. I bought my first place at rock-bottom prices only to have the bottom fall out. I traveled to the countries of Romania, Yemen, Jordan, and Texas. I lost my mother and father, a job, three men who weren’t marriable, and the hearing in my right ear. I was employed by a mega church and a megalomaniac. I maintained terrific long-distance friendships and made a few new friends. I learned that family is one of God’s greatest gifts. I learned that every loss, every bump, and every bruise was all part of the Plan. I became a fan of Spanish steak, white rice, black beans, and big puffy clouds. I discovered I’m more comfortable with diversity when I’m still part of the majority. I learned that being lonely and alone is a lot better than being lonely in a crowd. I became a blogger, a business owner, a wife, and a mother.

All in all, I wouldn’t trade the past seven years for anything.